Great Eastern Run 2016
My mum held out her arms. I stopped running and she gave me a hug.
“I’m ok. It’s just hard.”
I’d stopped running at 7.4 miles into the half marathon. The past 50 minutes had been a mental battle. I’d had lots of lovely messages in the week before telling me I could do it, but I didn’t believe I could.
I hadn’t run since Monday when my leg was painful. I’d rested it hoping that it would be fine on race day. And as I set off at 10:30am, it was. No pain. My legs felt good, a little too good. After a week of not doing very much, it was a struggle to reign them in and keep them from going the wrong side of 7:30/mile.
A morning shower had left a thin layer of rain on the road below us and each footstep kicked up a sprinkling of water that tickled my ankles. The crowd parted suddenly and a man was getting up off the floor. I asked if he was ok: “I’m good thank you. Thanks for asking.”
The first few miles ticked by. I tried to take a gel but it wouldn’t go down so I clung onto it until I found a bin a mile later. We ran past a house with its speakers on full blast and people outside cheering. I wondered if those out in their garden knew how much of a boost they were giving runners. This runner very much appreciated it.
I saw my parents a couple of times in their familiar positions. Supporting this race had become a well rehearsed routine for them. So I knew that they’d be waiting somewhere after half way with their car and a warm bag of clothes I’d given them ‘just in case’.
I went through half way just 10 seconds over my goal, but in my head it felt like a mountain. I debated with myself for the next mile and then I saw my parents and I stopped running.
I know that some people are of the opinion that you should finish a race at all costs. I’m not one of them. I’ve run 13 miles enough times this year to be ok with quitting. Yes, I could have pushed on and made it round, but I knew I wouldn’t get a time I would be happy with so my goal became to keep running this winter. Because last year I had 6 weeks out after running 13 miles on a dodgy leg and it was the worst thing.
Somewhere up ahead my niece was running the 5k fun run with her mum and dad for the first time. Apparently she said to her mum: “this is hard, running, isn’t it?”
Yes, it is. I’m glad she finished her race. I hope she’ll be back to give it another go. Because I will be.
Well done, Laura, it’s a hard stop to stop, but harder to go on and not be able to run again. We will be there anytime and every time any of “Your and our gang” take to the roads.
Love you always, mustard pots to the ready.
I’m really sorry that things didn’t work out as hoped – I know that feeling of working hard for something, for conditions to be good and yet on the day, it just doesn’t happen. I have a HUGE amount of respect for people that put their ambitious goals out there, knowing full well it might not happen. But we all know it WILL happen because it’s clear how dedicated you are and how much passion you have for running. Recover well and I hope your niece got a huge feeling of pride by doing the fun run.
Thanks Autumn. Always nice to hear nice words from speedy runners!
Well done laura i ran a half in march with bad leg struggled last 5 miles was out for 6 weeks after that i learned my lesson it must have been hard to stop
Sometimes, it’s not about winning the race, but winning the war and you are on track to do that! I know how that feels, so I really sympathise. This time last year, I couldn’t walk to my gate without limping and now I can walk for miles, run and spin cycle in the gym. Last year I wondered if I’d ever run again (to the bottom of my garden!) but I came back gradually, so stick with your gut feeling and be kind to yourself. You will get there: you have that steely determination. Good luck! 🙂
Thanks you. I appreciate this x
I’m sure you made the right call.
After running 2:01:25 at Budapest in April I really thought I get get under 2 at Hackney. But it was another really hot day. By halfway I was still on pace for sub 2 though I had lost track of the 2 hour pacer, a friend of mine who should have been right behind me. Then the heat got to me. I started to feel very uncomfortable and I realised I could keep trying, but it was only going to get harder as the temperature increased. I stopped, and walked/ran the rest of the race. At around Mile 8 another running buddy passed. He had taken over from our pacer friend who had crashed out with heat exhaustion.
That wasn’t my race, and yesterday wasn’t yours. The work you have put in won’t go away. Look after yourself, so you can keep your fitness up and have another crack at it.
Thanks Sarah.
Laura,
Greatly appreciate the candour in your blog.
In retrospect are you glad you ran Ealing?
Oooooh, good question! I had a really fun day at Ealing and if I hadn’t run it I don’t think I would have been any better off going into Peterborough. I’d still have had an extreme taper and lost a little speed (or at least thought in my head that I had lost some speed which amounts to the same thing). Other complication is that I had a commission to write a review of Ealing for a magazine so it makes it more difficult to back out.
So, in summary, no regrets. Not even the drunk wedding dancing that started the issues with my leg.
You are still, and always will be a hero to your nieces. Rob
Hi Laura
You’re so brave. Well done for looking after yourself and doing the right thing. There’ll be plenty more races that you’ll do brilliantly in. Main thing is to mind that body and head. I’ve decided not to run Dublin marathon in three weeks’ time because of loads of stuff going on at home (family being sick etc). I know I could get round it tomorrow but don’t want to risk a bad race and possible injury. Nothing is worth that. Now I’m holding out to hear if I get a place in London. Well done again and it takes some guts to just say no. Respect!
I am sorry the race did not go as you had hoped, but gains and achievements in running occur over the long term. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is realize when to stop, so you can be mentally and physically at your best on another day. There is a sub-100 half marathon in your future!
Richard C
Oh Laura, from my running days how I recognised your battle, both physical and mental, I’ve been there.. it’s better to have tried and not succeed as that’s not a failure.. a failure is not to try..!
Dust yourself down, sort your injurys and next time the battle will be on your terms.. Smile Laura.!
Thanks Ken! There’s always other races.