No attempt to look at the learnings offered to us runners by American sitcoms of the past couple of decades could or should overlook ’30 Rock’. Yeah you’ve got a lot of race medals, but do you have any Emmys? Didn’t think so. Tina Fey does, and so does Liz Lemon.
And so we turn our attention to what Liz Lemon has to teach us about our sport. Pay no attention to Jenna Maroney when she says to Liz:
“It’s kind of hard to take life advice from a single woman who is using her treadmill as a hanger for a wedding dress.”
Because there’s one very important lesson that Liz can teach us. And it’s not – don’t buy a treadmill because it’s a waste of money, especially if you live opposite a park like Liz does. Although that is also true.
No. What Liz Lemon was sent here to teach us is that if you want to be good at something you have to forget about looking hot. Do you think Liz Lemon would have won that Emmy if she’d stopped to pull that bit of lettuce out her hair? Nu-hu. Would she have become head writer on a fictional comedy show heavily based on Saturday Night Live if she’d wasted valuable time checking her clothes for food stains before putting them on in the morning? Get out of town.
What’s that you say? Looking hot is the only reason that I started running in the first place, so I could drop a few pounds, fit into some skinny jeans and make my ex regret the day he said: “I think we should see other people”. Well I’ve got bad news for you: running does not make you look hot. It’s the opposite of that. because you know that as much as you hang around at the bar across the street from his office, the time you’re actually going to bump into that ex is when you’ve just finished a hard track session and are looking for a discreet place to vomit.

The first rule of marathon training isn’t ‘buy a sports bra’ or ‘get your shoes fitted’, it is this: accept the fact that your hair will be a mess for the next 3-4 months and get on with it. I can’t remember the last time my hair could be described as anything other than birdsnesty. (Yeah it’s a word.) But it’s ok. Once you recognise that you’re going to look gross it frees you up to work harder free, from the shackles of social convention and hygiene. Because that is the way to success.
All your kit smells like a homeless person died in it? No excuse for missing a run – get out there and give me 5 miles at half marathon pace. There’s a guy you have a secret crush on at your running club? Put down the mascara – the only thing I want to see on your face is sweat and snot. Your friends are all going to a bar tonight and you want to go too but have to run? Run there and show them how you work those compression socks and wet patches.
Liz doesn’t disregard her appearance out of laziness, she know that even the slightest nano-second spent reaching down to do up her zipper could cause her to take her eye off the prize. And thanks to the trail she has blazed, now you know if too. But that still doesn’t mean I’ve forgiven her for this outburst…
Dennis: Hey Dummy, I was just telling these dummies how we used to go to the park and make fun of all the joggers.

Liz: Oh yeah, “I’m gonna run around in a circle so I can live longer.”